Words - II
Act Two Scene One
Soft, slender fingers place a tulip on the shiny mahogany coffin. Michelle Turner steps back, sighs heavily and looks at the tombstone. "David Kaufhold. 1972 - 2004" it reads. Such a terrible age to die at, Michelle thinks. Nay... such a terrible age to kill yourself at. The infamous north wind blows again. With a tendency to bring joy and ruin, it has done its work here.
Michelle turns to look at Jen, who looks like an anorexic skeleton, wearing a widow's black dress. Her face has lost all its beauty and splendour, and is as pale as a ghost's. She cant stop sniffing, and has to frequently rest against someone even while sitting. There is only one thing revolving around her mind. She has lost what was most dearest to her. This is a tragedy. No doubt. And Michelle was a part of the mourners as well. As close as Adrien and Jen.
She looks over to Adrien, who is behind the Greek Orthodox priest, side by side with David's parents, solemn in prayer. Adrien was a brother to David, even more closer. He holds David's mother to keep her from collapsing, infrequently patting David's father's back. He shares their grief as it were his own. And it is. A tall, Italian-looking man is sitting next to Jen, consoling her and comforting her. Adrien walks behind a tree after the priest is done praying. Michelle follows....
Michelle : What are you doing?
Adrien (hiding his face) : Uh... nothing... err.. why?
Michelle : Are you smoking again?! I TOLLLD you dont do it!
Adrien : You said no more than FOUR a week!
Michelle : Well did i let you smoke in the coffee house....
They both fall silent.
After Adrien met Jen at the coffee house, Michelle turned up. After they were done with their drinks, they went to David's apartment together to see that the worst had occurred....
Adrien (softly) : Please... Just one...
Michelle : Okay...
Michelle takes Adrien's pack of Bensons and lights a cigarette herself.
Michelle (pointing towards Jen) : Who's that with Jen.. ?
Adrien : Thats a friend of Jen's from college. I dont exactly know his name. They used to be good friends....
Michelle : Ahhann....
They both fall silent for another long, uncomfortable period. Adrien looking at a sultry void beyond, Michelle's gaze fixed at Jen's agony and David's coffin. How could someone with a starry-eyed love for life take away his gift to others so easily....
Michelle : Listen, i know this might hurt, but i want to ask you... do you think...
Adrien : That David should have done... this... ?
Michelle : ..Err... Yea...
Adrien : I dont know. He was pushed to the extent, i know that. He would never have hesitated to give his own life, and taking it himself was something he wouldnt do....
Michelle : I know that too... Do you know what happened.. ?
Adrien : Yea.. a bit... Before i left for the coffee house i met David, like a few minutes ago before... you know... He was really depressed, and I had a feeling he was thinking about Jen. Might have had something to do with her. She's too frail to talk, and I dont want her going over that again, but I think she was in the apartment when... you know...
Michelle : Yea, no need to say it. I'm sorry if you have to go over it again, but...
Adrien : Don't worry. Its okay. He was as good a friend to you as he was to me and Jen. You deserve to know.
Michelle : Thanks.. (smiles)... but i still think he shouldn't have done that...
Adrien : Why ?
Michelle : Because it was stupid..
Adrien : How.. ?
Michelle : Jen was crazy over him. And we know how much Jen means to him...
Adrien : His life. His sole purpose of existence...
Michelle : Exactly. So that means he should take himself away from her... ?
Adrien : Some things are too much to hear, to absorb, Michelle. You dont know...
Michelle : I don't agree with the way it all ended.
Adrien : I believe David had no choice. When Jen made him just a part of his life, and she never realised she was all of David's life, knowing the kind of person David is, i don't think he'd've done anything else...
Michelle : Why couldn't David just live with that fact? You know people doo blabber when they're angry...
Adrien : Hahaha.. He had only Jen to live for. Maybe that's what he was thinking; if he had anything else to live for. And then Jen should have realised the consequences of her words and actions. Words are the most powerful weapon one could use, yet used very unintentionally.
Michelle : I knoww.. but its stupid! Jen had only him to live for! Look at her! (she points to Jen, who had burst into tears as she gazed at David's tombstone). David acted childish and stole the most precious gift he had given to the woman he loves the most and who loves him, his ephemeral freedom! He was there for her, and that was enough for the both of them. Noww look at her...
Adrien : Jen had her responsibilities alongwith David. David had only Jen.
Michelle : I'm sure David had responsibilities too...
Adrien : His sole responsibility was to establish a financial base so he could marry Jen, and then provide for their comfortable lives and for their kids to grow up happily and for their kids' college fund. David wanted to grow old with Jen, and to live happily with her. That was his only motive for being alive...
Michelle : Big Deal! David would have become all of Jen's life eventually...
Adrien smiles curtly, as he draws out another cigarette from his pack. He lights it up, and blows away the smoke slowly. He looks at the cigarette; fire at his fingertips. He breathes smoke now. He turns to look at Michelle, his eyes meet hers.
Adrien : Michelle... Have you even been in love?
Adrien breaks off his gaze with Michelle. He already knows his answer. The eyes never lie.
Michelle : Wha.. what... do you mean... ?
Adrien : Pure, unconditional love? Total surrender? That could make you cry when it rains and you're alone, that could make you smile in the coldest of winters when you know you have someone to hold. Love. I'm talking about love.
Michelle : Well.. no...
Adrien is now back at looking at his void. He has a smile on his face.
Michelle : Okay look. I know what you mean, but all I'm saying is, it was a stupid thing to kill himself over...
Adrien : Was it stupid for him to kill himself when he knew he loved Jen more than Jen loved him? When you leave everything behind for that one person only to find out that that person has moved on ?
Michelle : Yes.
Adrien : Is it stupid to kill yourself when you have nothing to live for?
Michelle : Yes. Firstly... killing yourself is stupid, and secondly, Jen had HIM and other things to do....
Adrien (cuts Michelle short) : Someone you care for soo much that you cry every day for every moment you spent away from her. When you could not be with her.. Because of time and circumstance...
Michelle (cuts Adrien short) : Hold on! Jen had not moved on.
Adrien looks over to Jen. So does Michelle. Jen's friend is consoling her, and hugging her. His eyes were glistening with Jen's sorrow. He was crying with Jen. It was obvious how close they were as friends. Adrien turns to look at the ground, stubbing out his lifeless cigarette. Michelle sighs, and turns to Adrien.
Michelle : Adrien, Jen just told him what his life was like. That's it. You and I both heard the whole thing together. Jen was in too much shock, but she does not distort reality. She still loved David unconditionally...
Adrien : (smiling) Wow... when it comes to a mature conversation, I know who I'm going to turn to...
Michelle (blushing) : Hahaha.. thanks... I think I'm quite mature from the inside...
Adrien : I agree totally. But the fact remains that Jen tried to help him out, and David wanted to be helped thats why he let Jen kiss him, but the way they spoke to each other screwed it up.
Michelle : But all I'm saying is that its stupid to kill yourself over it..
Adrien : Still, Michelle, at that stage, even words can kill, or force you to kill yourself.
Michelle : Yea they can.. But I think its stupid.
Adrien : When you're in love, you can be as beautiful as the heart of a rose or as prickly as a grapevine thorn. Both are crimson.
Michelle : But you have to control yourself from doing something stupid... Killing yourself to get out of a bad situation, just to land in hell...
Adrien (lost in his own depth) : When you're in love, you lose control. Total surrender...
Michelle : But think of the consequences!
Adrien : God understands. Did you know that Christianity was an attempt to rationalize Judaism? It replaced the human relationship with God from one based on fear to one based on love... that God would not banish you to hell for every sin, but He would forgive you.
Michelle : I wish I had studied for my bar exam. Now i'll face the consequences...
Adrien : There is a difference between responsibilities and love, Michelle. You'll realise that once you find the perfect person for you... And then i'll ask you what you feel like. I'll always be there, where you're in love, when you're sad and lonely, and when you're as happy as anything.
Michelle : (smiling) Thanks... But God sent you to this world. You should love Him more than anything in this world. You should respect what all He has done for you, and not kill yourself over one of His creations.
Adrien : God sent you on this world to love Him and His Creation. And if His Creation inflicts such a wound on you, then you can go back to your Creator and justify your death. Have you read the Miskatonic? It says:
"Only Those Insolent Fools Ask Who Believe That Only The Eyes Can See, That Only The Ears Can Hear, And Only The Mind Can Believe.
And You Forget The Eternal Music Of The Diety That Has Been Put Into Your Very Veins.
The Instrument Of God's Sonic Choice. And You Fools Still Not Listen To The Heart.
For It Is There That You Will Find Love. And It Is There That You Will Find God".
~ The Miskatonic, 1:12-13.
Michelle stops for a moment, absorbing all this. She may have said that she has never been in love before, but she is starting to feel what the sensation may be like, but it is so vague and generalized that the passion evades her. Adrien puffs smoke and continues...
Adrien : At the end, he had stopped loving Jen. He could have kissed her after he told her that he loves her. He didnt. He realised that him saying that was nothing but words. He had stopped loving Jen. He had no reason to live anymore. So he stopped living.
Michelle : So not all words are lies...
Adrien : Everything is a lie, Michelle, Everything. Even me, and even you.
Michelle : Hahaha.. you and David just love this line don't you?
Adrien : Great men said great things, only to be washed away by the sands of time; God's minions; known to us as time and circumstance.
Michelle : And when you think about it, you're like its true..
Adrien : Haha.. the irony.
Michelle : Tell me something, Adrien. Give me an example. What is a lie?
Adrien : Nothing is true and nothing is a lie. Light is the absense of darkness. A lie is the absence of truth.
Michelle : Look, like, everything that is going on in this world IS a lie. Its all a facade...
Adrien : True. Have you seen that Evanescense video, Everybody's Fool ?
Michelle : Yea, and I can see how you can draw it into context here, but listen to me. When i say stuff like i love you to Jen or you, or when i said that to David, I wasnt lying now was I? So everything is NOT a lie..
Adrien : (with a indescribable smile) Okay, given that it is not a lie, but you can define your love for me in many ways, right?
Michelle : How ?
Adrien : Like i love you as my best friend, and so do you. I loved David like i love my brother. I love Jen like my very own sister. One truth in a cornucopia of lies. I love you Michelle, but as a best friend, not like i love David, not like i love Jen...
Michelle : Okay, given. I love you as a best friend, its true. And its not a lie that you love me too, you just love me in a specific way.
Adrien : But in the words, in their very being, is the lie contained.
Michelle : There are many types of love. Okay, yeah, sometimes people say what they don't mean, they go back against their words and stuff, and their promises dont last...
Adrien : And sometimes when they say that, they should'nt have. They should have thought of the consequences.
Michelle : Well... actually.. words ARE lies... but i DON'T want to believe that mine are! (cheeky smile)..
Adrien : Hahahah.. i love it when you smile like that... (pauses, then smiles weakly) Come here...
Adrien holds his arms wide open as Michelle glides into them, against his chest, as they support each other in their time of need. Adrien rests his chin softly on Michelle's head, looking towards the sky, where one of his bestest friends has gone, thanking the Lord for giving him another one in his arms. Michelle presses her head against Adrien's chest. She has hugged Adrien many times before, but she can actually feel his pain right now. And for the first time it has settled in her that David is actually no more. She lets out a soft, inaudible sob. Adrien kisses Michelle on her head softly, and releases his hold slightly.
Adrien : Come on, lets go. I think Jen needs us.
Michelle : Okay. (smiles)
They both walk together towards Jen, who is now alone in the graveyard. It is just three of them, and the sky is a mournful grey. It is going to rain. Jen will not cry alone in her sorrow. It is going to rain soon....
Inspiration ::
Naveen Qureshi - Log Dated June 21, 2004
- Shemrez Nauman Afzal -- June 22, 2003
posted by Mumra | 2:38 PM
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